I have not posted in quite a while. Like you I am getting used to whatever this new “normal” is.

One of the topics I hear the most about from people is how hard it still is. The problem is that most people feel like it shouldn’t still be hard. There is a culture in the US that does not allow us time to grieve but instead tells us to just pull up our bootstraps and move on. There is a vaccine now. Everything is okay. Move on regardless of whatever grief, loss, sadness, anger, or other feelings you have. This is the American Way!

It is so unfortunate because for the last year and a half (and for some of us back to January 2017) we have been going through  multiple traumas. But there has not been an acknowledgment of that fact. People feel a bit crazy if they are still struggling. Or maybe they are on the feelings roller coaster. One day is fine and the next day feels topsy-turvey.

The information we are getting seems like it changes every day. Is it safe to go indoors without a mask? Can vaccinated people get the virus and spread it? One day we hear yes and no and a few weeks later it is probably not and probably yes. Again it is enough to make you feel crazy. The risk assessment you did in May has probably changed in July.

So how do you manage this all? The first thing is you do the best you can every day. And you understand that some days your best may not be as good as you want it to be. Secondly, you keep up on your self-care your walks or bike rides or Friday night zooms with your friends. It’s harder to schedule things now because people are doing things but keep it going! If you have to return to an office it may be harder to keep up the self-care but I strongly encourage you to try and find a way to do it. Thirdly talk about it. A real issue is that many of us feel crazy in our heads but if we talk to others we find out many experiences are the same. Feeling like it is not just you having these feelings is a great way to reduce any feelings of isolation. Of course, if it all feels like too much I would encourage you to find a therapist.

Take care of yourselves and your families.

The free online dictionary defines anxiety as “a state of uneasiness or tension caused by apprehension of possible future misfortune, danger, etc.; worry.”

What can you do when you experience anxiety?

1. Don’t fight it or deny it. Since anxiety is such an uncomfortable feeling most people try to push it away. However, the more you push your anxiety away the more intense it will be when it returns and it usually returns.
2. Anxiety is often masking an underlying feeling such as sadness, anger, or fear. Allow yourself to sit and notice what is going on underneath the anxiety. If you allow yourself to have those feelings your anxiety will abate.
3. Exercise is good both when you are feeling anxious and as a way to prevent anxiety. Research has shown that exercise can be an effective treatment for anxiety right up there with therapy and medication.
4. Daily meditation is an excellent treatment for anxiety. You do not have to meditate for long periods of time each day, ten minutes a day can significantly help anxiety. There are many different ways to meditate and many free resources for this on the internet.
5. Reduce your caffeine intake. Caffeine is a stimulant and can worsen anxiety symptoms.
6. Write it out. Often anxiety manifests by racing thoughts. Taking the time to write out these thoughts can often take away their power and as a result, reduce your anxiety.
7. Talk it out. For the same reasons as above talking it out can help you feel better about a situation.
8. Train your brain to do things differently. When your mind starts racing with anxiety visualize a stop sign and stop your brain from moving forward. You will have to do this a few times in order to stop your brain but the more you practice this the easier it will get.
9. Give yourself some daily worry time. You know you have a lot on your mind and you are worried so allow yourself a certain time every day to worry. When the time is up using your thought stopping techniques to stop your worrying. Your worry time should not be more than half an hour.
10. Seek professional help. If the above suggestions do not help your anxiety it may be time to seek professional help from your doctor or a therapist.

I have some free short meditations on my website for you to try it out.

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