So I have really been working the last year and a half on being a calmer person. The life lessons I have had in the past few years have all shown me that it is so important to be both present and grateful. But I suppose like many people I was hoping to fundamentally change myself. I wanted to be relaxed and present and grateful. I wanted to be Cathy 2.0. What I have found out is that while I can be more present, relaxed, and grateful, that perhaps I will never be that “Relaxed Person” that I wanted to be.
So that really got me to thinking was my desire to be that relaxed person holding me back from being a relaxed person? Perhaps by judging myself and my personality I was keeping myself from being that person. A total Catch 22. So now as I continue with my goal of being more relaxed I allow myself not to be relaxed. If I get worried about something I tell myself it’s okay to worry. Lots of people worry. When I allow myself to just be in whatever space I am in, it becomes okay. Okay if I am worried, okay if I am relaxed, just okay to be me. And for me that is how the change will happen.