I am on a Brene Brown kick. I am listening to The Power of Vulnerability which is Brene giving one of her workshops. She is a great speaker with lots of good things to say. One of the things she talks about in this recording is leaning into joy. She talks about a scenario that goes something like this: Imagine it’s Christmas Eve and a family is in the car. The radio is playing Christmas carols and everyone is singing along. What happens next? Number one audience answer is- Car crash. She talks about how we have become programmed to expect these dramatic and negative scenarios. How we don’t allow ourselves to “lean into joy”.
I found myself doing that this week. We are buying a new car. An exciting event and one that happens infrequently. The car is on order and we are waiting to pick it up. Have I spent the week thinking about all the exciting new features that are in my new care? No. What I have been thinking most about is how I am scared to drive my current car because we are trading it in. We got an estimate based on its condition last week. Which means I have to keep it in the same condition to get that money. So what I have found myself thinking about this week is how I could have an accident and not be able to trade the car in.
Now while that would be a cruddy thing to happen, focusing on my energy on thinking about a potential car accident is probably not the best use of my time. I could instead be imaging how I will be able to connect the music on my phone to play in my new car. How I will then be able to always be able to drive listening to my own funky mix of music. Or how this car will warn me if I leave my lane or how my gas mileage will almost double. I should be leaning into the happiness of getting a new car.
Brene talks about how when people suffer loss it isn’t the big things they miss the most. It is the everyday things. The grocery shopping together or watching that new series on Netflix. I am working on letting myself lean more into joy and to embrace the ordinary.